Although I don’t own a car, in any vehicle there is a term called “cruising speed.” That is, it is the most useful speed at which you have the lowest fuel consumption. What if we use this in relation to our interactions with other people?
At the initial stage, I accelerated quite a lot, and… I felt that I simply did not control the situation. It’s like catching a lot of fish and not understanding what to do with them when they are in your net. I didn’t have many “fish”, but you get lost in your feelings. In needs. That is, you cannot clearly tell yourself what exactly you need. As a result, you accelerate too much, and you simply burn your internal fuel.
The second term (cruise control) is about the moment when you have reached a certain speed and maintain it. You do not accelerate, you do not stop. But you move steadily forward. And now I feel that I have found the same “speed” at which you do not cling to anyone. You are not looking for “just a person”. You want to be useful and for the person to be useful to you. Because only under equal conditions will you, again, be able to move in the same flow.
“Your person” does not necessarily live next door. Moreover, it is precisely “next door” that is a compromise, when you agree to all the minuses, which are offset by one plus – “she is nearby”. But if “next door” is a store that sells avocados from the day before yesterday, this does not mean that it is better. It is simply “nearby”.
Your person can’t always be found at a comfortable distance. In a comfortable place. Therefore, you need to decide for yourself who you need – just a person or your person? Are you ready to compromise and is she/he ready? Because it’s always a matter of two.
Let’s move on. The route is set. Have a safe journey.
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