..into the unknown tomorrow..
Notes has always been perceived as a safe house…where I freely shared my thoughts, feelings, experiences…for almost 10 years as…the same about And, but…for almost 2 years.
It’s amazing to feel how everything changes. It takes on a new form. And so it is with this song. Last time, when I was supposed to go to Kyiv, for the first time in a long time, I changed its caption to “New markings on old asphalt.” Denoting that I am used to it in a new form. But last time, the trip fell through. Why? Because I was myself.
When I really want something, I change the route. And this is no longer “Stein’s choice” – it’s my choice. Conscious. I put safeguards in place that save me from rash things. Is it safe to go to Kyiv right now? Probably not. Will it stop me/us?…
The place is set, the date and time are left. And it’s a strange feeling when you’re 36, and you… don’t know. How to behave, what to do, how to look… you only know clearly that there are no “50/50” or “I’ll treat you”. I don’t like these measures when you invite someone to a place.
Who knows where this first step will lead. I also don’t know if I will be interesting to a person. But this meeting is very important to me. Because it is a conscious step of two adults. Only time will tell where exactly. But I believe that the future is bright. I am used to not starting something new without finishing something old, and for now this fully corresponds to my internal canons of how certain things should happen.
I believe her. I feel her. I am fascinated by her curiosity. Seeing her own, some other meanings in my works. Interest in creativity, especially joint ones. Worldview, social position, attitude towards children and animals. Hobbies. Tastes in what you can look at. The desire to discover something new. Accepting me as I am. And much, much more. This is the case when you want to hug a person and never let go. Because you are afraid of accidentally losing them. Because you understand that you will not find such a coincidence in the things that interest you for a long time, if you find them at all… so…
“In the subway, excerpts from other people’s books and songs
Somewhere deep inside me leave traces…
What it will be, my world, on a new day,
Neither traffic lights nor rains know…
And while Kyiv slept, life rushed on,
New markings on old asphalt,
And let everything that did not come true come,
You will always remember me!”
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