life

Life Thoughts

A little busy

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I’m always ashamed when I come back home (here, in the And) and see that I haven’t written or shared my thoughts in a long time. I’ve been rehabilitating my back, got a job, tomorrow is the end of the first week. Oh. It’s been a long time since I worked somewhere with a schedule, but everything is going easier and better than it seemed. They give me the necessary level of freedom, I give my opportunities. Somehow everything happens. Right now it’s cold here, the temperature outside is close to zero, in places it’s snowing and lying, there’s no heating at work, so we’re working in survival mode until it gets warmer. There I’ll be able to close work issues and hope that then there will be time for my thoughts on the blog and that these thoughts will be in my head, because for now it’s empty.

The week was hard and almost every day at the end of the working day I went somewhere else, returning home closer to 8-9 pm. It’s harder than the work itself. But I’m coping.

I would like to do more, but I don’t have time for that right now. It’s funny, but I was (sort of) blocked on Tumblr, so…fuck it. I don’t really need it. There was no promotion there.

Now I have to check everything by money, because there are certain expenses and there is no way to earn steadily right now. Moreover, one work account was blocked, so there were even bigger problems with money. In general, I just try not to pay attention to everything and live until the moment when everything will be easier because either something will fall apart, or additional sources of income will be found. I’m going to look for goods and sleep, because right now this is more important than anything else. I hope to write a couple of posts on the main blog soon. I love you all. See you soon 🙂

Plans

Router Sex

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I spent half a day messing around with a router that for some reason reset its settings and wouldn’t let me log into the admin panel. I had to flash it several times, disassemble it, but now everything is working stably again. I hope it will last longer this time. Although there are opinions that a more stable version should be looked for. However… so far I have understood that I will have to write an article-instruction on its firmware, so that it is stored somewhere within the blog. Because the information is quite useful, since this firmware and this version allow you to use torrents on the mobile Internet, which is very good. Because not everything that interests me can be found on streaming platforms.

It seems hypocritical to want to have licensed software at work, when you yourself do not use licensed content 100%. Isn’t it? Although… everything related to software is licensed now. This is a good step forward. Although…Windows on my computer is not licensed. So that’s it. But I’ll install Linux at work and I think that over time I’ll be able to fully switch to it. The only question is whether Silkypix licenses will work on Linux? Theoretically, they should…

Thoughts

I’m alive, I just got a fly in my eye…

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I’m working on a local project, so I don’t have time for anything else. I looked – I haven’t been here for 5 days. It’s crazy how quickly time flies. However… what I’m doing is a small-large social project that should unite the entire city (and its events) with a population of about 12,000 people. This is a kind of pilot project of the idea of ​​what can be achieved if you try to unite different segments of the population. Will it be successful? Time will tell. But for now, I’m investing a lot in it.

In a sense, this is my promising job. The funny thing is that it’s a full-time job (with a schedule) for $150 a month. On the other hand… times are turbulent and no one knows what will happen with trade in the future. So this would be at least some kind of base for actual earnings. Maybe it makes sense, there are all sorts of possible additional payments and something more interesting in terms of money is already looming there.

Have I found my place? And no. But the other day I put on my earring (for which I pierced my ear), wrote Sa Crea on a fabric ribbon and attached it to the earring. That evening I was myself. That evening I spoke in front of people for the first time.

But I see my main and more important blog here. Where I am with you. I share, like, thoughts. I share them with my loved ones. I love you all. See you soon. I went to add posts to the main blog about a couple of anime 🙂

Plans Thoughts

Not on time

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I watch people who have gone to Europe now, and… I understand that it’s not the right time for the idea of ​​moving somewhere there. Or moving at all. Simply because everyone now has either a problem with obtaining a visa, or a problem with work. So, is there so much desire to go into the unknown, using their only chance? For now, most likely, they want to get some stability here, and there are certain plans and ideas on how to do it.

In general, having your own house, even $ 250 a month does not seem like such bad money, especially if it would be a net stable income in addition to what you have. So… it remains to find yourself and this income on the side. This would allow you to close certain issues and move on. For now, my head is only filled with creativity, and that’s good. If for the second month in a row I consider myself a more creative person, then the year is going as planned. In the final case, you can leave at any time. We just need to know where and why, for now… let’s think about something here.

Other People Personal Thoughts

The divergence of planets

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If you imagine our life as a universe, and people as planets – over time, different bodies approach each other, and then, on the contrary, move away. And you, literally with your own hands, see how this happens around you. How people with whom you saw a common vision and things begin to perceive differently what you do. And you come to understand that your worlds, or the universe, are changing. Everyone changes at a different speed. Is this critical?

I used to be very sad because of the thoughts that something could change, you could stop communicating with someone, someone could disappear from your life. Now there is an understanding that in most cases there are those who are “here and now”. You either become related to them and move on, or… everyone has their own path and their own universe.

Perhaps this was the perception earlier that with moving, people and contacts that were there would be lost. Because you will become useless to anyone on the one hand, and on the other – everyone will become useless to you. You will have a new circle of friends, new faces around you. Your own reality. And this is more of a plus than a minus. Because the new reality will perceive you as new. From my feed on Facebook, I see how they don’t perceive me and I see that this me is not needed by those who needed that one. And there haven’t been any major changes yet. I haven’t had a few more piercings in my other ear, tattoos, and in general, most of me still lives “behind the screen”.

I just want to live and not think about how people will perceive your appearance or your creativity. So as not to even bother with all this… that’s why I want to move…

Plans Thoughts

The screeching of the hard disk was reminiscent of the past.

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I connected an old hard drive to my computer, I needed to find a license key for a plugin. I came across old archives – music I listened to back then, a few photos…why do we cling to the old?..

The further you go, the more you resemble that meme when “the boy Kolya is 30 years old, and he still hasn’t decided what he wants to be when he grows up.” Apparently the question isn’t even who he wants to be, but rather who he doesn’t want to be, looking at others who are “over 30”.

When you look at vacancies – you have a constant feeling that “this is not the job for you, this is not about you”. Because you understand what kind of work it will be for 10-12 hours a day. On the other hand…what have you achieved? You missed all the opportunity to invest in something to be higher and better than what they can offer you now. You don’t have a fat paw up your ass that will pull you somewhere, so…what were you expecting?..

At such moments, it seems that you will just stay where you are and continue to do the same thing as before. Because then you will at least have free time. Otherwise…

I would like to do the same direction that I do now – repairing equipment, but everywhere only packers, assemblers, and other warehouse workers are needed. Which is sad. But how is it. Pros? You can get 2000-2500 euros without thinking about some courses and learning languages. But how long will you last in such a job when you don’t see life in general? Someone for a long time. Me?..I wouldn’t want to abandon the blog, photography, and just work for money. Because why do you need such a thing?..but there are not many other options now. So let’s think…

Someone gets the opportunity to go somewhere and they’ll arrange it for them, and someone…someone has to find their own place..

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Personal Thoughts

Lightness

Music

I’m dizzy from the feeling, I’m dying but still breathing..

Music

Jumpsuit, jumpsuit, cover me…

Photos

Empty Room 2.0