I’ll paint myself white, my eyes will turn blue…

“I’ll dye my hair white, my eyes will turn blue,
I’ll sing beneath your window every single night.
I’ll study every book you read,
So I’ll know exactly what you might ask.

I’ll wander the neighborhoods where you walk,
Just to be sure of what you’re doing right now.
And if asked why I’m kicking down the door,
I’ll say: I just want to reach your heart.

‘She’s crazy,’ your mother will say,
‘Drama is inevitable with her,’ your father will add,
‘Walk the streets carefully,’ your brother will warn—
But just listen to me; don’t take advice from anyone else.”

I have a whole story connected to this song; it was the very reason I wanted to attend an Aziza concert—which is exactly what I did a little over a month ago.

Upon hearing the lyrics, I immediately took the song personally. You see… my own creative work isn’t for everyone; the average person might well perceive it as the output of someone unhinged or unwell. At times, I’ve wanted to be defined primarily by my creative work. At other moments, I’ve wanted the opposite—for people to look past my art and see that, outside of it, I am actually quite an ordinary person. In fact, the line “Just listen to me; don’t take advice from anyone else” has become a sort of personal motto for me. It’s what you say to someone dear to you: “Don’t pay attention to what others think. Just trust me.” Hear Me Out…

Nothing was used here except for a light source (a 200 UAH flashlight), a Panasonic G90 camera, the built-in “Expressive Art” filter, and an Olympus 12-50mm kit lens in macro mode. About 280 shots were taken (or 140, if you account for the fact that the camera saves both the filtered and unfiltered versions). In short—business as usual.

Objectively speaking? This piece was inspired by a person. Who knows—perhaps this marks the moment I stop (or maybe not) creating “dark” works, and start focusing more on lighter, calmer themes. Anything is possible…

“Perhaps the songs I listen to
Aren’t all that beautiful,
Perhaps my words, too,
Are completely ill-timed.
Perhaps, if I so desired,
You would be mine—
Perhaps, if I so desired,
You would never forget me!”