If you take the number of things that make my ass burn in life, you could… ..oh, I think I already said that you could heat the entire planet for free. I’ll just leave it here…
And that too…
It’s not that it’s strange that I get “burned out” by someone else’s success. But I don’t know what else to call it. I’m a very lazy person myself, so you could say that “it’s my own fault.” But in a way, I think that it’s not even me who is to blame, but my almost zero level of luck. I’m the same person who, shooting at a target, will hit himself in the eye. And, probably, I just have a chronic feeling that “successful people” will almost mock me for being who I am and having what I have.
Sometimes I think that I’ve already lost this race. She tells me about the problems, and I think to myself “does anyone really… want to die more than I do?” Because one day I won’t answer because of that.
It seemed to me that I had escaped this abyss. But now I increasingly come to the conclusion that I just postponed the moment a little. And all these attempts to find inspiration, meaning, other shit – it’s just about how to last another month or two or a year. When I said, once, that I wouldn’t make it to 30 – it was a joke. When I say that I’m not sure I’ll see my 40 – the jokes are getting fewer and fewer.
It’s not easy letting go
Feelings that I don’t know
I’m looking for a sign below
I’m so heavy
We may die young, but that’s okay
We can’t go on
’cause we keep falling down down down
But that’s alright, it’s alright(c)Pentastone
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