In all this desperation I fear there’s nothing I could say to win this fight
Saint Creature Cause you hesitate much more than I could ever estimateAnd that’s alright?.. Read More
A. Schopenhauer “The World as Will and Representation”. Quote 1
I decided to quote thoughts that struck a chord. Like this one
“Just as the degree of sharpness of consciousness varies greatly among different people, so it varies even more between different species of animals. However, in all, even those closest to plants, consciousness is sufficient to pass from action in the immediate object to the intermediate one, as a cause, that is, to thought, to the perception of the object; for the latter is what makes them animals, because it gives them the opportunity to move according to motives and therefore to seek or, at least, to seize food, – while plants move only according to irritations and must either wait for their direct influence, or become exhausted: they are unable to seek or catch them. In the most perfect animals we are amazed at their great intelligence – for example, in the dog, the elephant, the monkey, in the fox, whose mind Buffon so skillfully described. By these most intelligent animals we can measure with sufficient accuracy how strong the mind is without the help of reason, that is, without abstract knowledge in concepts: on our own we are so We cannot know this well, because in us reason and reason always support each other. That is why the manifestations of reason in animals often turn out to be either higher or lower than we expect. On the one hand, we are struck by the intelligence of that elephant, which, despite the fact that during its journey through Europe it had already crossed many bridges, once refused to step on a bridge that seemed too unstable for its weight – although it had seen the rest of the procession of people and horses usually passing over it; on the other hand, we are surprised that intelligent orangutans do not support the fire they find, at which they warm themselves, by laying wood: the latter proves that such intelligence is required here that is impossible without abstract concepts. Knowledge of cause and effect, as a general operation of reason, is even a priori characteristic of animals; this is quite evident from the fact that for them, as for us, it is a prerequisite for any visual knowledge of the external world. If any further special proof of this is desired, it is only necessary to recall that, for example, even a perfect puppy, with all its desire, does not dare to jump off the table, because it anticipates the weight of its body, although it has not previously had a completely corresponding experience. However, in discussing the mind of animals, we must be careful not to attribute to it what is a manifestation of instinct – a faculty that is quite different in its action from both it and reason, but often very similar to the combined activity of both.”
I saw this video and remembered this quote. It’s amazing how the dog trusted an unknown mechanism and didn’t try to escape from it, knowing that they would help her. Is this a manifestation of instinct? Or trust? Or intelligence? It’s hard to say. But it’s interesting to read these thoughts through the examples you encounter.
After viewing
Yesterday’s film sparked renewed thoughts about why the world is the way it is.thou Read More
Watched American Beauty (1999)
Is it weird to watch adult movies from your childhood? Read More
Well..with +2 to me
All that’s left is to wait and go get a puncture. After that, I’ll definitely be “the only one in the area.” Or, rather, in the city. Is it critical? I don’t care. If they need me, then let them perceive me as I want to be.
“So they kill another dream
Feed on my self-esteem
Well, hey kids, this is showbiz
Starving artists have to die
So pigs can learn to fly
On our dime, this is our time”
I don`t try to find my place…
..in a diary of Jane,, Read More
Unfathomable fear
Lately I have been haunted by an incomprehensible fear. That something will go wrong, or the beginning of something new, like the treatment I am currently undergoing. When I was admitted to the hospital in the morning and I was uncomfortable that my bike was left somewhere near the entrance, and I myself did not know how long I would be in the hospital. Fear of a new job. Fear that there will be no time for creativity. Fear of losing some opportunity that seems to be “still there”. Many fears.
I think I need a break. From all this…
Mother told me
My mother told me a funny thing today. In my opinion, funny. Like “when you work and no one will say that you don’t work and you won’t “prick anyone’s eyes” with this”. But I thought that this is the least anyone would reproach me for. Let’s make a list:
– I am a person who increasingly indicates a “neutral” gender;
– I like furry art, and I have a collection of strange sex toys;
– I take strange photos, including of myself, and I hide it less and less;
– I consider the idea of a relationship between three people of any sex and gender to be normal, if people find in each other what they lack;
– I will probably be the only man in the city where I live now who has not just one, but both ears pierced.
I think that this list already indicates things that should be more questions than whether I work or not. And how exactly. However, I see that if you show the world what it can get from you – it increasingly closes its eyes to your peculiarities, because you are perceived comprehensively. That is, with all your pluses and minuses. I fight for my right to exist where I am, with what I can. That is probably why I am interested in everything at once. I want to be able to do and know everything.
In life, always do two, but take one. That is, you take two steps for the benefit of someone and one for the benefit of yourself. In this way, you will have to be perceived as you are. Simply because two steps forward are better seen than one step back.
If an eccentric person does something, and others do nothing – then he will be eccentric in himself, because he does something when others do not.
Toxic relationships
We finished watching the series The Outlaws, and it led me to a certain reflection related to people.
The series showed a toxic relationship between a girl who was smart, but had a “hobby” of stealing something, and a guy who was less fortunate in life and wanted a quiet life instead of survival. And so their acquaintance led to the fact that she became a kind of “adrenaline junkie” who constantly wanted thrills, and the guy, on the contrary, tried to avoid problems with the law and in general. The story of the relationship ended with her leaving him, getting off the train before it was sent, and he left “for a new life”. Six months later they met – she, with a bunch of problems and he, in the life he aspired to. And then, suddenly, she remembers that she is “extremely in love with him”, but he has the sense not to continue the relationship with her, but to build a new one with a person who suits him better. What thoughts did all this make me think?
With a certain periodicity, you scroll through your head the thought of why you don’t continue communicating with people you once liked? Inspired you, caused some feelings? That is, there is some kind of seed living in you that believes (or simply perceives from memories) that your life would be better if you resumed communication “with someone from…”. But something stops you from doing this. And I think it is understanding. First of all, understanding the fact that your paths diverged (mostly) not even because of you. So there is nothing to turn back, because each person simply went their own way at a certain time. But…
Having your “ears” you hear that these “bells are not one-sided.” And this is where we are caught up in this same story from the series, when you tell the hero “well…well I hope you won’t do this stupid thing?..because I’ll stop respecting you”, only the hero is you.
I know that things that were in the past should stay there. But the healthy half understands this. I think that every person consists of another part besides it – the emotional part, multiplied by the memory part. That is, your subconscious says “but memories and emotions can’t deceive you” – and they really do. They don’t deceive, because there, at 15-17-20 years old, you experienced feelings that were for the first time in your life. Apparently, this is what draws you to them. As for reality – during this time you managed to get burned many times after that, and you can’t throw the opposite experience out of your memory either. This is what stops you.
In one song they sang “we will never be younger than today”. I think this applies to people too – because we will never be the same as we once were. So the emotions will be different every time. And I think the emotions that we can get from new people can be even brighter than those that can happen when communicating with someone old.
It remains to somehow convey all this to your brain.
Router Sex
I spent half a day messing around with a router that for some reason reset its settings and wouldn’t let me log into the admin panel. I had to flash it several times, disassemble it, but now everything is working stably again. I hope it will last longer this time. Although there are opinions that a more stable version should be looked for. However… so far I have understood that I will have to write an article-instruction on its firmware, so that it is stored somewhere within the blog. Because the information is quite useful, since this firmware and this version allow you to use torrents on the mobile Internet, which is very good. Because not everything that interests me can be found on streaming platforms.
It seems hypocritical to want to have licensed software at work, when you yourself do not use licensed content 100%. Isn’t it? Although… everything related to software is licensed now. This is a good step forward. Although…Windows on my computer is not licensed. So that’s it. But I’ll install Linux at work and I think that over time I’ll be able to fully switch to it. The only question is whether Silkypix licenses will work on Linux? Theoretically, they should…